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Dear Black-Ops,
I have this problem. You see, I have a friend who runs a fairly popular web site on the internet. He's usually really good about keeping the site up to date, but for a few months he has been a complete and total pile. For starters, he put up a lame excuse, then left the site for a couple of months. Now he has been adding excuses almost weekly. Is there something wrong with him? Why can't he just do what the public demands, and give us an update? Where is the fan loyalty dammit? Did he all of the sudden just get a life?
If you can help me to help him, please do. Thanks.
Yours,

Down And Mad Nerd

Down And Mad Nerd,

Thank you for the question first of all, as for this friend, of course there is something wrong with him!! It isn’t all that hard to update a web site weekly. If your friend knows anything at all, he should be able to do it in under 30 minutes easily. If he can’t then he has no business running (or claiming to run) a web site.

This “friend” of yours needs to seriously re-evaluate his position, because if he can’t keep up with what the public demands, he’ll be seen as 1 of 2 things:

1) He’ll be seen as a lazy BUM with thousands of excuses, or
2) he will be seen as a writer with no new material that expects you (the fans) to read and re-read the work he has already done.

Now to correct this misconception about suddenly getting a life; you can’t just wake-up one day a say, “Hey, I think I’m going to get a life from now on.” It doesn’t work that way! Everyone already has a life, and it can’t be started over again. Your friend has obviously chosen the life of a computer geek, meaning he has little to no friends; he lives in his parents’ house even though he’s probably in his twenties. He probably has never seen the sun, and is white as a ghost, and he’ll never have a girlfriend. All he should be doing is sitting at a computer somewhere writing code, coming up with new ideas, and updating his web site.

Finally what you can do: bug the hell out of him!!! Send him emails, at least twice a day, reminding him of his obligation to the readers. If you know where he lives, send him snail mail saying the same thing. If none of this gets any response have his web site fans send him email saying they will boycott his site in a set period of time. This will definitely get the desired result, because his greatest fear is having a web site that no one will read.

Sincerely,

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